Lately, there has been a lot of news about teachers and school employees having sexual relations with their students.
I'm going to do something risky: I'm going to my own ideas as to why, it seems, we're hearing about more and more of those relationships. As I am not a researcher in any field related to the phenomenon, please take what I am about to say as opinion that has been shaped by my own observations and experience, and nothing more--or less.
Some people say that we're hearing more about such cases because they're being reported more frequently. That's probably true, and some people who were sexually exploited years, or even decades, ago are coming forward, much as many men who, as boys, were sexually abused by priests are now speaking out. However, I don't think increasing openness about the topic and reporting of incidents can account for all of the sad cases we're hearing about.
I have long believed that most elementary- and high-school teachers begin their careers much too young. Typically, they start when they finish their bachelor's or master's degrees, depending on where and what they're teaching. If they have followed the conventional trajectory, they are in their early- to mid- 20's when they finish their bachelor's degrees, and their mid- to late- 20's when they finish their masters'. Therefore, they are--especially if they are teaching high school--not that much older than the kids they're teaching.
Now, some would argue that young people are more knowledgeable about sex and relationships than earlier generations (which include yours truly) were at a similar age. More information is available more readily, to be sure. But more information doesn't necessarily translate into more emotional development. Nor does hormonal activity which, according to some reports, is occurring at earlier ages than it has in the past.
These neophyte teachers, who are just barely out of adolescence, spend their days among adolescents and young children. That can be a trap for young teachers who haven't fully learned what's appropriate, much less nurturing, behavior with teenagers and children. Some of those teachers were, like many of their peers, engaging in indiscriminate sex (along with binge drinking and other kinds of reckless behavior) only months, or even weeks, earlier, when they were in college.
Of course, being among other teachers and school employees and administrators who haven't matured emotionally doesn't help them, either.
These problems have existed for a long time, you say. So why are there more cases of children who are sexually exploited at school?, you might ask.
Well, I think that as families and other structures that were supposed to protect kids are breaking down, more new teachers are coming from what might be called "dysfunctional" families and communities. A kid is more likely to be abused in such an environment. Even if he or she is not abused at home or by a family member, he or she is more likely to experience sexual exploitation, or other forms of violence, elsewhere.
While what I've described may be more common among the poorer and less-educated, no economic or social class is immune to breakdown and dysfunction. Even in so-called intact families, kids may not spend very much time with their parents, or other responsible adults who have their best interests at heart. Hence, important lessons about social and sexual mores, not to mention the ability to know when one is in danger, is not passed down.
Furthermore, most young teachers have never been in any kind of professional environment but school. Therefore, they do not learn, as they might in other environments, that they are responsible for their actions and that those actions have repercussions. That is why some teachers and school employees who are caught having sexual relationships with kids--and, worse, exclaiming that those kids are the loves of their lives on Facebook--don't understand what's wrong about what they've done. And some, like Mary Kay LeTourneau, think that they are being deprived of their "right" to make their livings as teachers when they are imprisoned and banished from the profession.
In brief, I think we are going to hear about more teachers having sexual relations with their students because they are less stable and emotionally mature than teachers of previous generations. And even those teachers were too young, spiritually and emotionally, to be teaching kids.
I'm going to do something risky: I'm going to my own ideas as to why, it seems, we're hearing about more and more of those relationships. As I am not a researcher in any field related to the phenomenon, please take what I am about to say as opinion that has been shaped by my own observations and experience, and nothing more--or less.
Some people say that we're hearing more about such cases because they're being reported more frequently. That's probably true, and some people who were sexually exploited years, or even decades, ago are coming forward, much as many men who, as boys, were sexually abused by priests are now speaking out. However, I don't think increasing openness about the topic and reporting of incidents can account for all of the sad cases we're hearing about.
I have long believed that most elementary- and high-school teachers begin their careers much too young. Typically, they start when they finish their bachelor's or master's degrees, depending on where and what they're teaching. If they have followed the conventional trajectory, they are in their early- to mid- 20's when they finish their bachelor's degrees, and their mid- to late- 20's when they finish their masters'. Therefore, they are--especially if they are teaching high school--not that much older than the kids they're teaching.
Now, some would argue that young people are more knowledgeable about sex and relationships than earlier generations (which include yours truly) were at a similar age. More information is available more readily, to be sure. But more information doesn't necessarily translate into more emotional development. Nor does hormonal activity which, according to some reports, is occurring at earlier ages than it has in the past.
These neophyte teachers, who are just barely out of adolescence, spend their days among adolescents and young children. That can be a trap for young teachers who haven't fully learned what's appropriate, much less nurturing, behavior with teenagers and children. Some of those teachers were, like many of their peers, engaging in indiscriminate sex (along with binge drinking and other kinds of reckless behavior) only months, or even weeks, earlier, when they were in college.
Of course, being among other teachers and school employees and administrators who haven't matured emotionally doesn't help them, either.
These problems have existed for a long time, you say. So why are there more cases of children who are sexually exploited at school?, you might ask.
Well, I think that as families and other structures that were supposed to protect kids are breaking down, more new teachers are coming from what might be called "dysfunctional" families and communities. A kid is more likely to be abused in such an environment. Even if he or she is not abused at home or by a family member, he or she is more likely to experience sexual exploitation, or other forms of violence, elsewhere.
While what I've described may be more common among the poorer and less-educated, no economic or social class is immune to breakdown and dysfunction. Even in so-called intact families, kids may not spend very much time with their parents, or other responsible adults who have their best interests at heart. Hence, important lessons about social and sexual mores, not to mention the ability to know when one is in danger, is not passed down.
Furthermore, most young teachers have never been in any kind of professional environment but school. Therefore, they do not learn, as they might in other environments, that they are responsible for their actions and that those actions have repercussions. That is why some teachers and school employees who are caught having sexual relationships with kids--and, worse, exclaiming that those kids are the loves of their lives on Facebook--don't understand what's wrong about what they've done. And some, like Mary Kay LeTourneau, think that they are being deprived of their "right" to make their livings as teachers when they are imprisoned and banished from the profession.
In brief, I think we are going to hear about more teachers having sexual relations with their students because they are less stable and emotionally mature than teachers of previous generations. And even those teachers were too young, spiritually and emotionally, to be teaching kids.
Depending on the school district, you will sometimes see 22 year old men and women teaching high school students. In 10th grade, my English teacher was 22. I don't remember her last name, but I recall that she was a young Jennifer Tilly doppelganger - with a smaller chest. But then again, who doesn't? While there is some additional perspective as 22 year old, versus 16 year old kids, the difference is not that great.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, this teacher allowed the class to call her Jennifer. And I don't believe that ANY guy in that class would have said a peep - if she had slept with them.
This reminds me of the new history teacher who started at my school when I was in Grade 12.
ReplyDeleteShe was perhaps 24 and this was her first ever professional position. She was the youngest teacher on staff by a significant margin.
For the very first day of classes, she shows up in a short skirt and a tank top! (Note that this was a private school, so the students all wore uniforms.) The following day, she wore a skirt that even covered her ankles.
So far as I am aware, she did not have any inappropriate relations with her students -- though I'm quite sure that she received some offers.
I don't think this is really fair, and buys into a lot of the hype around reckless college students (unless I was the only one studying in college). Of course people mature at different ages, but this is very dismissive of young adults in general; they are not all potential statutory rapists. As a young college instructor, I am asked out on dates by my students, and of course I tell them this is an inappropriate way to talk to me.
ReplyDeleteThere's such a huge world of difference between a high school teacher and a high school senior engaging in a relationship and sexual abuse it seems incorrect to my mind to even conflate them.
ReplyDeleteWhich isn't to say the latter doesn't involve problems, it just involves problems of a very different kind.
I agree with Mikoyan - a consensual relationship between a 20-something highschool teacher and an older teenager is icky, inappropriate, and a bad-bad-bad idea on multiple levels, BUT - it's not quite the same as an elementary school teacher fondling a pre-pubescent child.
ReplyDeleteTeenage sex ain't exactly new. Although back in my day, we knew to have sex with each other, dammit - not with adults!
I'm not just being snarky. I mean, let's face it - teenagers have been having sex since before the concept of a "teenager" even existed. I kind of wonder if some sort of breakdown of age distinctions/authority is part of what's going on here.
Adults aren't "growing up" and leaving the teenage sex to the teenagers, and the teenagers are viewing authority figures as - I dunno..."friends"? Potential "more than friends"? As opposed to distant authority figures from whom one needed to hide the fact that one was having sex with someone one's own age...which was the way we viewed adults, as I recall.